Monday, January 9, 2012

Bullshit Issue Politics

It's everywhere, in evermore discouraging piles!
If you're of the Establishment "right" and you need a primary surge, all the fuck you have to do is trot out some lame-ass nag like flag-burning, DOMA or the primere, hot-button bullshit issue of every good GeOPapist, abortion: Mount the whistle-stop platform & rouse the rubes with a tear-jerker about millions of "unborn, murdered children a'goin ta HEYELL on account o' theyam dayamn Planned Parenthood heathen" and the hilljack vote is a virtual lock. Beat the war-drum and sing a few stanzas of "Bomb Iran"...You'll have those Papist Johnny-Rebs and old farts mailing tea bags in no time. It's the kind of fodder self-righteous fakes and other funny-mental-ist asshats just eat up, and a can't miss strategy.
Say your platform lists a bit to port: All you gotta do is play to your audience with hyperbole and ad hominem about gay marriage, global warming, or a myriad other things government can't and will never change, and the dope & perversion-crazed groupies will be running after you like a rock star!
A master politician will avoid like the plague any issue of genuine substance: Steer clear with all your might of how the country is tens of trillions in debt going on hundreds due to your bead-fingering, idol-worshipping/bagel-munching altruism. Remember that you "don't know anything about" wasteful War-On-Concepts that actually achieve nothing but sinecure for your relatives, friends and cronies. Finally, avoid substance-heavy issues like excessive taxation, civil liberties erosion, violations of Constitutional law, the burgeoning military-industrial complex, endless cannon-fodder police-actions, the national debt and anything else that might incur the disfavor of your owners.
The key thing is never rocking the political career boat when your ship is coming in!

5 comments:

texlahoma said...

Sounds like a playbook for all the political campaigns but one.

BBC said...

Nothing is going to improve, follow your own path to the end the best your can.

Galt-in-Da-Box said...

The only thing more disgusting than the moronic campaigns is the camp-followers: The "0bam-ney" ladies beating the hate-Iran war drums are bouncing off the FaceBook walls. I once heard politics described as "a popularity contest for ugly people"...That's damn straight!

billy pilgrim said...

it takes a lot of self control to not call the obama worshippers on facebook fucking idiots.

if there was ever a false idol, it's him.

BBC said...

if there was ever a false idol, it's him.

They are all false.